Meaningless Emotions
by Chewy518
Summary: She made a vow.. That she wouldn't waste this year on meaningless emotions. But somethings changes.. sk sm sr ik sux at sum
1. Default Chapter

Disclaimer: I own nothing but the plot.

(a/n) this is something random I started to write. It might not be very many chapters. Well it probably will. Any way on with this story.

**Meaningless Emotions**

**Prologue**

My life isn't the best.. Well I'll tell the truth. It sucks. I know most teens my age say these things. But with me its different. My life _really_ doessuck. I'm an outcast. I'm unwanted. I mean I may never have a boyfriend. Scratch that. I wont ever have a boyfriend. Kinda sad huh?

My life didn't always suck you know? It was alright when I was little. That is until my little brother was born. When Souta came into this world everything seemed to go downhill. Well it might already was going downhill, but thats when I started to notice the tension between my parents. It seems that my father, Naraku, had a little extra on the side. My mom, I guess found this out.

One of her friends saw my father with this other woman, hugging and kissing and all that other stuff. Lets just say my mom was pissed. But she acted like she didn't know. I admire her for that. Because my mom, Kay Higurashi, is one tough bitch. One night she followed dad to one of his 'business' parties. Lets just say that she found dad and his little slut going at it. They will never be the same anymore. Spending the rest of their lives in a rehabilitation center isn't all rainbows and butterflies.

Believe it or not this all happen before I reached the tender age of 7. Scary huh? Think about all the stuff I saw. Maybe thats why I'm all screwed up now.

School life for me was... entertaining. In first grade I got suspended for indecent exposure. Don't wanna get into that. Long... long... LONG story.

In second grade I started to notice how I didn't fit in with the other kids. Maybe because I was more mature. Or I tried to be carefree and innocent. Anyway, I talked constantly to try to hide my turmoil inside. But I guess one day I went too far. The girls in my group told I was talking way to much. The teacher scolded me. But I got them back in the end. I stopped talking all together. For 2 whole months.

I guess this is when my mom noticed my problems. Because she started to push me into after school things. Like karate, kick boxing, and every other sport she could get me into. She didn't know she just made matters worse for me. I became a jock. A girl jock. I hang out with most of the guys. Sure I had girls that were friends but I didn't do many girlie things. Heh, I didn't even dress like a girl. Well I still kinda don't. But we wont go into that.

Third grade was alright. I still had my guy friends but I got close to a couple of girls, Sango and Rin. They were cool and not the type of girls you'd think I'd hang out with. They were girlie. I mean they are girlie. But they love me. Fourth grade was when something drastic happened. I was talking to a group of girls when one of them laughed at me when I said something about a book they had read.

"HAHAHAHA sure Kagome... Since when do you read books that aren't about sports. Face it you're dumb." She said. I just smiled and nodded while I was secretly dying inside. So I started to fit the description of the dumb girl. I did my work, but that doesn't mean I turned it in.

This went on for months, until my teacher, the fucking bitch, called my mother. My mom went in my room to take away all the stuff she thought I couldn't live without. Little did she know I could live without almost everything in my room. Books, and my bed I couldn't. Oh and a light... need that to read the books.

Oh how I get off track so easily. Now where was I? Oh yeah. She found all my work. She gave it to the teacher and they were astounded by my IQ. So I was like eff it... can't beat them.. join them. But I wasn't just going to do what they wanted me to. So I became the bad girl. I got into a lot of fights, with guys. I could kick anyone's ass. Well except him... and his brother.

Inu Yasha, my life long crush. That I have absolutely no kinda chance with. His older brother (by a year) Sesshomaru, which is like the bane of my existence. He always has something smart to say. He can never keep his comments to himself. God he makes me so angry! Nobody can be as perfect as him... oh.. sorry about that. Just went off into one of my many rants.

Anyway... fifth grade through eighth went by just fine. But thats when my thoughts got more on the girlie side I guess. My crush on Inu Yasha developed into something more. Something accustomed to love. Yep the big 'L' word. But he acted like he didn't notice me. Like I wasn't worth the ground he walks on everyday. So I started to become friendly with him. Started to try to dress more girlie. Hell I was in high school now. I was a big freshman. I could be more of a girl if I wanted to.

So I consorted Sango and Rin, who loved the idea. They put make up on me. Bought me clothes. Everything under the sun, I even got a pair of heels. But he still didn't notice me. But his friend did.

I ended up with Kouga Copeland. We dated for what... about a week before I just broke up with him. Couldn't take all the possessiveness. Saying " I'm his woman" and stuff like that. I was like he has gots to go. Then I went back to my old roots. Me being me. Not trying to impress Inu Yasha.

Plus one of his friends, Hiten, told me I had a snowball's chance in hell of going out with him. That broke my heart. I totally ran to Miss Kairei's room (who is a great teacher). I put my head down on my desk and cried. Which wasn't a good idea cause Sesshomaru walked in class and noticed me. He wasn't even an ass then. Which surprised me fully. He asked Miss Kairei if he could take me out of the room to calm down. She nodded with a worried look on her face. That made me cry harder.

So Sesshomaru took me out into the courtyard. Hugging me close as I wet the front of his shirt with my constant flow of tears. That was the day I vowed to never cry another tear in my life. Ever since then it's been sorta weird between me and Sesshomaru. Well I still dislike him a lot a lot. But theres that fateful day that we'll always have.

Shoot! I spent all this time telling you about how my life sucks.. that I forgot to tell you about my appearance! I'm about 5'5'', I weigh like... 115lbs, blue eyes, did I mention I have a pretty nice bod! (yeah right) I guess the sports paid off. I'm 15 almost 16. (Just two more weeks) Ummm lets see... I have long wavy black hair. Thats about it.

So back to my life. Well this year, I made a promise. That this year was going to be mine. I will be me. Be all I can be. This year me, Kagome Higurashi, was going to shine. That I won't put up with those meaningless emotions. Like friendship, jealousy.. etc. Especially the worst one of all.. Love.

Oh how wrong I was.

(a/n): This is the prologue and is about the only thing that will be in Kagome's POV. This is just telling some details. Well I don't know how to say it but. Yeah. Review if you want.


	2. Chapter One

Disclaimer: I own nothing but the plot.

(a/n) This is the first chapter of Meaningless Emotions. Please be gentle... no not really tear it up if you want. Thanks for the REVIEWS!

**Meaningless Emotions**

**Chapter One**

The sun was just rising when there was exactly one knock on the door, before Kay Higurashi entered her daughter's bedroom. The light blue walls had a yellowish ting to them, because of the sun outside.

She walked over to the bed and looked down at the lump in the middle. She stood there for a second with her hands balled up into fist on either hip. She mumbled something that sounded like "I know this girl heard me knock on the door, let along come in." She took in a deep breath and let it out.

"Kagome! Get up!" She bellowed. The lump in the center of the bed started to move and make sounds. Soon after the brief movement the lump went still once more. Kay let out a exasperated sigh , bending over she grabbed an handful of covers yanking them away to reveal a groaning girl, with her eyes shut tight.

"I'm not going to tell you again Kagome." Kay said before she turned around and exited the room. Kagome opened her sapphire eyes and looked around the room before she sat up and swung her legs over to the edge of the bed. She sat there for a few minutes trying to clear some of the grogginess from her tired mind. She stood up with a yawn, rubbing her tired eyes and making her way to her closet door. She reached for the door knob and started to turn it.

She opened her closet and looked around at the different varieties of clothes. She simply walked in over to a pile in the middle of it.

Letting out a sigh, she grabbed a pair of baggy jeans. She lifted them up and gave them a nod of approval, tossing them out the closet door to land in the middle of her bedroom. She then went over to the shelves and got a form fitting white 'FCUK' shirt.

Once she was dressed, she walked out of her room. Nearly tripping over her obese cat, Buyo. Regaining her footing, she walked over to her brother's door and slowly opened it. She peered in on her sleeping brother. He still had an hour and a half to sleep.

"Lucky bastard." she muttered under breath, closing the door. She looked down at her watch, it read _'6:45 am'. _She let out a gasp and ran down the stairs. Making it without any accidents she picked up her backpack.

"Mom! I need you to drive me. I won't make it if I walk today." She yelled before she ran out of the house to the car in the drive way. She sat in the Mustang convertible, glazing around her neighborhood. All big houses, no one outside except the gardening people or some maids coming to work.

(--)

(a/n): sorry but hahahahaha... I just turned on my stereo and hahaha and the first thing I hear is backstreet boys. Sorry... I'm a dork I know.

(--)

The front door opened and her mom came out in her slippers and gown. She watched her walked over to the car and get in.

"First day of school and you're already fucking up." She could hear her mother mumble. Kagome hung her head, listening to her mother talk about her under her breath.

(-- Shikon High--)

Kagome walked into school as her mother pulled off with a shriek. She walked over to where everyone's name and first period class were listed. They would get their schedules in the first class. She put her finger on the paper scrolling it down looking for her name.

Finding her name and class she set out for it. She knew the room all to well, because she happened to have the same exact teacher last year for math. Walking up the stairs she tilted her head in acknowledgment to everyone that said hello to her.

Making it to room 145, she opened the door and walked in. She looked around the room, seeing that the only person in there was Miss Kairei. '_Great... forever the first one in class'_ She thought to herself as she put a fake smile on her face. Miss Kairei turned around to see she wasn't the only person in the room anymore.

"Good morning Kagome! How was your summer vacation?" The teacher said cheerfully. Kagome inwardly winced. '_terrible.'_ She had spent most of her summer visiting her dear cousin, Kikyou. You found it fun to point out every single one of Kagome's faults. Even though like looked pretty much the same. Except for the blue eyes. Kikyou had brown ones.

"It was great! I went to visit my cousin Kikyou for most of it. We had a swell time." Kagome said with a big fake smile on her face. _'OMG... wait... did I just say swell? I think I did.'_

"That sounds fun... spending time with family always is." Miss Kairei said turning back to the board and continued to write crap on it. That Kagome didn't particularly care about. She moved towards a desk but was stopped by Miss Kairei.

"Kagome, I'm trying something new this year. We're gonna have assigned seats. You sit over there by the window. The last of the two seats." She instructed. Kagome nodded her head and moved to her destinated seat. She sat down and looked at her hands, starting to drift off into her own mind. Oh how she loved the silence and solitude.

She was in her happy place. Running through meadows and forest, swimming in a lake or stream. She felt totally carefree. No worries. She hated to admit, but she felt all warm and fuzzy inside.

"Kagome..." she heard someone calling her name. She looked up and saw the faces of her two best friends, Sango and Rin.

"Hey you guys! You both have this class?" She asked them in her best fake hopeful voice. To tell the truth she'd rather they be in some other class.

"Not Rin... She has World History this period." Sango said sadly, causing Kagome to put up a fake distressed look upon her face.

"That sucks! Man... well..." Kagome trailed off as the door opened to reveal the one, the only, Sesshomaru Taisho. She blushed when he nodded his head towards her in acknowledgment. But she quickly shook it off. She didn't want him. He was the last person she wanted. She wanted his younger brother. Inu Yasha.

The warning bell went off and Rin excused herself from the classroom, heading to her class up the hall. Sango took a seat next to Kagome and adjusted her jean skirt, that Kagome frowned at. She looked down at her baggy jeans that hung just low enough to show the top of her black underwear. She wondered why they hung out with her. She clearly didn't really fit in with them. The classroom started to fill up. Miss Kairei looked up and let a easy going smile appear on her face.

"I think I should start putting you guys in our new seating chart." Miss Kairei said with a slight giggle in her voice when half the room groaned. "Now... Sesshomaru move over there in front of Kagome.." She continued on giving everyone their assigned seats. Sesshomaru moved in front of Kagome and acted like he didn't see her for a minute or two. Kagome scowled at the back of his head. Suddenly he turned around an looked at her.

"Looks like we have to put up with each other again this year, Higurashi." He said in his deathly calm voice he always has. Kagome rolled her eyes and sneered at him.

"Believe me Taisho... WAIT! Why is it that you're in my math class every year? Stalkerrrrrr..." Kagome said stretching out the word to bring the point on home.

"Maybe if you weren't so high in your academics... wait! Never mind." Sesshomaru said turning around. He started to copy down the notes on the board with mild interest.

"I have 10 juniors and 10 sophomores. So I decided to mix it up. Have you noticed that the desk are in pairs of two's, in a row. You will be working with that person every time we need to be partnered up. So I suggest you guys get pretty acquainted." Miss Kairei said walking out of the room. Groans followed her out.

Sesshomaru turned around again with the tiniest hint of a smirk on his face.

"Turn back around Sesshomaru... I've known you since like forever. Plus you live right next door, 'nuff said". Kagome said looking down at her desk. Her hair was falling down in her face, which she quickly tucked behind her ears.

"There is a lot of stuff that you don't know about me.. _Kagome_."He said in his dead pan voice.

"Fine... what don't I know about you?" Kagome sneered hatefully.

"That I find these petty little arguments the best part of my day. I swear I can't go a whole day without arguing with you. You also don't know is that... that you are one of my best friends." Sesshomaru confessed. Kagome just looked at him shocked. She stayed silent through out the rest of the class.

(--)

After the bell rang, Kagome found herself going to a class that she knew she had no friends in. Rin had chemistry and Sango had English 10.

She rounded the hall and came across the desired room number. She smiled cause she never been in this class before. She opened the door and walked in and almost turned around and walked back out.

Sitting behind the desk was the one teacher that hated her guts, Mr. Hirota. He tried to fail her last year. But her mom handled that. She saw how he looked up at her with a tiny smirk on his face. _'This is going to be a long day.. scratch that.. this is going to be a long year.'_

(--)

Lunch she had to say was one of her least favorite time of the day, well at school. She looked down at the questionable looking cafeteria food. She sat down a table by herself thinking she'll have some alone time. But Rin and Sango sat down seconds afterwards.

"Hey Kag! Whats up?" Sango asked poking at the mystery meat on her plate.

"Nothing.." Kagome answered... she always answered that way. What she really wanted to say was.. what does it look like I'm doing? But alas, that was rude.

"Guess who I have in like all my classes you guys!" Rin squealed as she pulled out the peanut butter jelly sandwich, that she brought from home. _'Smart..'_ Kagome thought to herself looking down at the hard roll. She picked it up and dropped it back down on her tray. It sounded like a rock when it landed on the tray.

"Who?" Kagome asked with a smile on her face.

"Shippou Kitsune! Man.. how I like that boy." Rin continued to talk endlessly about Shippou. Kagome just nodded her head every once in a while. Sango was actually contributing to the topic. Adding in her escapade earlier with Miroku Horshi, the school pervert. It was obvious that she liked the guy, as she ranted about how he grabbed her ass. Kagome made no comment.

The bell rang signaling that lunch was indeed over. She waved goodbye to Sango and Rin. She threw away her untouched 'food' and walked towards the stairs. She started to climb them, feeling that burning in her legs. '_Man I'm out of shape. Volleyball practice today is gonna be horrible'_ Kagome thought as she walked in her Honors English 10 class. She nodded towards Miss Kaede, nobody knew her last name.. so it was just plain ole Kaede. She was seated and looked around the empty classroom. She sighed, she was always the first in class. A few seconds later Shippou and Miroku walked in.

"Hey Kagome." Shippou said as he took a seat in front of her. Kagome smiled at him. She liked Shippou, he was like a brother to her.

"Hey Shippou! I haven't seen you like all day!" Kagome said hugging him around his neck.

"Yeah I got most of Rin's classes." He said as he hugged her back. He then continued to talk about how pretty Rin looked that day. Suddenly Kagome felt someone rubbing her hind end. She had completely forgotten about Miroku! She whipped around and slapped him. He just rubbed his cheek and smiled. They started some friendly conversation for a few minutes when the person that walked into the classroom caught her eye. It was Inu Yasha. He looked over to them and smiled, walking over to them.

"Hey you guys?" Inu Yasha said in his gruff voice that Kagome just loved to hear.

"Hey!" The all said in unison. The class slowly started to fill. Kagome noted that it was exactly the people in this class. She smiled at that fact. They knew she liked quiet and she sorta hated to admit, but there were some really cool people in this class. She looked over to Inu Yasha, whom she was sitting next to, and smiled slightly at him. He returned it with full force.

Miss Kaede walked to the front of the room talking about something about how shes glad to see them all back in her class that year. Kagome was distracted by the note Shippou handed her.

Shippou: _You still crushing over Inu Yasha?_

Kagome scowled and quickly wrote her response. _Yeah so? _She passed the note back to Shippou who go this strange smirk on his face. He wrote some words down and handed it back to her. She opened it and read:

_Guess what... Hes crushing you too..._

Kagome's eye widen and she looked over to Inu Yasha who noticed her. He smiled and mouthed 'hello'. Kagome quickly turned her head, to give the allusion that she was paying attention to Kaede. But if you looked closely you could see the tiniest hint of a smile on her face.

(--)

Kagome was in the girl's locker room putting on some shorts and her knee pads. She looked around at the other girls that were getting ready for practice. She noticed a couple freshmen here and there. The door opened and in walked Sango and Rin. To her surprise they were carrying gym bags. They made their way towards her and sat down.

"What are you doing here you guys?" Kagome asked them all shocked. She understood Sango, who was tomboyish in their younger years. But Rin? Rin was not a sporting type. No hand nor eye coordination at all. But alas, here she was getting dressed for the first practice of the year.

"We decided to join the team too. I always wanted to play this sport." Rin said, trying to figure out how to put on the knee pads. Kagome sighed and showed her.

"Plus Kag, we totally get to miss school some days.." Sango said getting up, ready for practice. Kagome lets a smile slip onto her face, a real one. She couldn't believe they were going to be. She figured this was ultimately going to make them closer than anything else.

"Okay you guys. Are you sure you know what your getting into?" Kagome asked them with all seriousness. Coach Williams was one touch cookie. She made them run laps. But then again, Sango and Rin always ran track. They heard the whistle blow and they slowly start file out of the locker room.

(-- After Practice.. Front Steps --)

Rin was holding an ice pack to her knee. There was an ugly purplish bruise there. She groaned out. Kagome just smiled, totally unhurt. Sango was poking at an raspberry on her elbow.

"I asked you guys in the beginning if you knew what you were getting into.." Kagome drawled. They both glared at her, which only caused her smile to widen.

"You didn't tell us that we'll have to dive on the ground repeatedly, just to bump some white little ball." Rin said motioning to the redness on her forearms.

"Do I need to repeat myself?" Kagome asked her voice filled with sarcasm. Rin rolled her eyes and continued to ice her knee. "Are you going to quit the team?" Kagome asked.

"No way in hell! I actually had fun.." Sango said standing up, stretching out her tired muscles. Rin made an agreeing noise. Kagome gapped at them. She couldn't believe that they weren't going to quit. Just then her mom pulled up and they all loaded in the car.

"How was school you guys?" Kay asked the girls with a friendly smile upon her face.

"Great.." They answered in unison, which resulted in them all giggling. Kagome noticed that the radio wasn't on and she reached down and turned it on. Thats when they all heard it! It was their theme song.. for a car anyways. They all started to sing along.

"_We went for a ride..mmhmm_

_We went for a ride...oh yeah_

_We went for a ride.. ladeoh_

_We went for a ride..oooh"_

Kay raised an eyebrow at the over enthusiastic girls. But she couldn't help but smile at them, she didn't how this song got them so riled up.

"_We went for a ride_

_Undercover of the twilight_

_And the traffic on the road_

_And there's only you and I_

_I hope we never get back home_

_'Cause I'm feeling serenaded_

_By the coming of the night_

_And I wish we'd go forever_

_And I wish we could just.._

_Drive away_

_We could drive away_

_We could drive away_

_Into the night.."_

The girls were bobbing their head simultaneously with the rhythm of the music. Kay smiled and pulled into her drive way. She parked and turned off the car, opening the door causing the music to shut off. The girls all groaned together. They got of the car and started towards the house.

(--)

Sango and Rin just left for home. Kagome walked over to her bed and pulled out her diary for her nightstand drawer. She got out a pen and opened it . She started to write:

_September 1st, 2004_

_Dear Diary,_

_Today was my first day of my sophomore year of highschool. It went as well as I suspected. Nothing special.. The day started out alright I guess. Sesshomaru kinda freaked me out in class. Saying I was his best friend and everything. I got this weird feeling deep down in the pit of my stomach. Kinda when you're nervous about something. OMG.. guess what I found out! Inu Yasha likes me! Well I don't know for sure. I found out from Shippou and he wouldn't lie about those kinda things... Would he? No time to ponder on that right now. Rin and Sango are on the volleyball team. I enjoyed seeing Rin get beamed with the ball repeatedly. It gave me the giggles. Well I'm kinda bushed. Night I guess.._

_Kagome_

She closed up her diary and put it back in the drawer. Nobody knew she kept one and she wanted to keep it that. It held all her thoughts about things. The good and bad. She laid back onto her pillow, closing her eyes. Drifting off to sleep, with not a care in the world.

(--)

(a/n) there you have it! Chapter 1 aren't you so proud? Not really... I do not own the song used in this chapter. It belongs to FeFe Dobson.

glamouzmami x3: Thanks for the review! I smiled... well I hope you like this one..

JewelQueen: I read your fic.. I liked it a lot.. you're good writer.. way better than me anyways..

Aisu-Hime: Sure you can help me with grammar and crap... I know mine is bad.. when I type. Just im or something... my s/n are in my profile.

LYN: I wrote more! YAY! Thanks for reviewing...

until next time... Review!


	3. AN

A Real Important Author's Note

I just want everyone to know that I will start to rewrite all my fan fictions in their entirety. They will all be redone and revised. I will start this revamping during my Christmas break from college….

I will try to do one story at a time. I will write the whole thing beginning to end. I plan to finish at least of them in a span of two months.. for each. I am in college now and yeah I have lots of work.. So maybe some of them won't be really written until the summer, where I plan to have free time. But I promise it will be worth the wait. I myself have become a lot better writer and my stories seem to have promise especially TKP.. lol and my other ones. that are intended to be a few stories put together.

I think I will start with Hero, It might not be a one shot anymore… But I tend to lean more on Sesshomaru and Kagome relationships but I guess I can squeeze out a Kagome and Inu Yasha pairing. Yeah it will be a one shot just written better and longer. I will just wrap it up better.

Next I plan to work on Love Conquers all, I might add some… wait I'm going to add a lot of things in it… maybe play more into different aspects of the story and characterization.

Same thing Except Different will be next since a lot of people seem to like that story a lot. I plan to tie it all together better and have more depth with the chapters…

The killing perfection is going through drastic changes… I may have to print it out and like mark it up and add things, changes things to make it better story…

Whoa Days of Our Lives might get a title change and a total revamping also… like different with the same aspects.

"Thoughts of a Misinformed Mind" is going to be… almost kept the same, but yeah… the 2nd chapter will be changed…

Meaningless emotions, I love that story I forgot all about it.. I plan on finishing it. So now.. I'm about to head out and buy a bunch of 5 subject notebooks and start writing when I have the chance you guys wish me luck!


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